Deep dark depression
Love in the light
My future looked bright
Everyone may be out to get me
I can never trust my sanity
Will I ever know my family?
I’m alone, I’ve been cold
I’m five years old
I was marked, I was sold
I was pressed into a mold
I was beaten and broken
I was always soft spoken
In the end I was heartbroken
I was gagged and bound
Locked in a cage of sound
Trapped beneath the very ground
Lost memories, never found
Bindings held me in captivity
I was relieved of all my dignity
I’m so sick of all this bigotry
Needles pierce my tender flesh
I may never taste success
The father would oppress
My mother would suppress
The pain I felt was constant
Life was always my conflict
My future I cannot predict
Drugs cloud the vision
My past was always hidden
Locked in maternal prison
I need a religion
Maternity, the decay arouses me
I will never be carefree
I’m trapped in this, horrid reality
Powerless, was I always lost
Will I ever know the cost?
When my heart covers in frost
Trapped in sadness, power to the chaos
Jar inside us, filled with darkness
Leaking into my frozen carcass
Mother said that it was harmless
Demons claw, and bend my spine
Alone and cold, I’ll lose my mind
Everyone I knew turned a blind eye
I have never seen the sky
Pain in the end
Were they ever my friends?
This is deep to be honest. It sounds like you've been through some stuff with family and friends. You've had friends and even family turn on you and all you could think to yourself is your all you got and you cant do anything about the abandonment you feel.? I like how you put it into a poem combining the words and feeling It was almost like I could feel what you where feeling when you where writing this.
ReplyDeleteI love how you were brave enough to pout this out here for everyone to see. I also love how you did a poem because I haven't seen anyone else do anything like this. I loved all the words you used and I think it is a really great piece
ReplyDeleteI like how different it is from everyone else's, how it helps people get insight on how you feel about things. It's a really good piece.
ReplyDeleteYou have a good way with words to be able to create a poem so personal to you.
ReplyDeleteI like how it rymed.
ReplyDeleteI enjoyed how you were abel to rhyme with such ease.
ReplyDeletel like the way you decided to write this. Also the picture ties in well with the story.
ReplyDeleteThe way this was written was heartbreaking- your skills with imagery and metaphor really make the piece powerful. I loved the way you wove your words to make this particular tapestry's image.
ReplyDeleteyou can really feel the heaviness of the story, its taxing on the emotions to read and a very brave thing to come out with a piece like this, great job chance
ReplyDeleteThe way you wrote this drew me in like the Earth holds onto us. This was probably my favorite flash fiction that I've read in this class, it's really well written and has really deep meanings in it. I love it!
ReplyDeleteThis is deep and has a sense of heaviness. Your writing drew me in and gave me goosebumps, very engaging read and a phenomenal self portrait to say the least. You are very brave to post this, and I respect you a lot for it.
ReplyDeleteI liked how you were able to rhyme with such ease while telling your story.
ReplyDeleteYo that was deep. The whole piece seems to be about drug abuse and how this person is doing it to forget the memories and scares left behind from a dark past. Nice job man. Hope i got the story right.
ReplyDelete